You’ve fought too much. You’ve cried hard enough. You’ve isolated yourself for too long. You’ve believed you can write a good closing to a story with a predetermined bitter end. It’s like reviving a patient with rigor mortis, watering a plant that’s been withered long time ago. Pity yourself, for you have long been chasing pavements, and I am sure I know you know it would lead you nowhere.
It’s about time to rest your laurels and get a good night’s sleep. End this insanity, put down your sword. Wash your face off all those traces of tears you’ve shed futilely. Pick up other tasks to and work on them fiercely. Go back to your Creator and thank Him for everything that happened, how He had saved you from an impending lifetime of misery. Bask in the sunshine and remember how this world is crazy yet oh so lovely. Enjoy the warm glow of other people who actually love you back. Then one morning rest assured you will wake up and it will not hurt anymore. At that point in time, you will look at this and laugh at how silly you were, and maybe pat yourself at the back for being so brave. I believe someday, you will learn to love again wholly, maybe even more than you did this time.
For now, put in your mind how somewhere Far East they used to repair broken porcelain pieces with pure gold. Yes, that’s what you are. The battle scars will be where the light will shine through thus will give you your own genuinity. The time of lamenting has lapsed. Let the dead be buried. It’s time to let it go, especially if the one you’re fighting for will not, and will never, fight with and for you anymore.